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Friends: A Democratic Tune

NPR | By David Slavin,
Bruce Kluger
Published January 17, 2003 at 12:00 AM EST

Lyrics to the Friends parody:

So no one told you that your party's gone astray

Campaign's a joke, we're broke, our polling's D.O.A.

It's like we're always stuck in Bush's war

And yet we haven't got the slightest clue of who -- or what -- we stand for, but...

We'll be there for you (like we've never been before)

We'll be there for you (just forget about Al Gore)

We'll be there for you...in 2004

Announcer: Hey, America, coming this fall, say hello to six new "Friends from the Democratic Party! There's war hero John Kerry, southern charmer John Edwards, Mr. Insider Dick Gephardt, fiery civil rights activist Al Sharpton, lovable prude Joe Lieberman and the humble doctor nobody knows, Howard Dean. Alone, they're nothing. But together, they're one great candidate!

We'll be there for you (and we're multi-cult'ral, too)

We'll be there for you (got some whites, a black, a Jew)

We'll be there for you....in 2004

We'll be there for you (we're no longer such a bore)

We'll be there for you (six o' one, half-dozen more)

We'll be there for you (from New Hampshire to Des Moines)

We'll be there for you. (Can't decide? Just flip a coin)

We'll be there for you (like we've never been before)

We'll be there for you....in 2004

Copyright 2022 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.

David Slavin
David Slavin and Bruce Kluger began writing satire for NPR's All Things Considered in 2002, after their initial attempts at collaboration — brokering a Mideast peace accord and mapping the human genome — proved unsuccessful.
Bruce Kluger
Bruce Kluger and David Slavin began writing satire for NPR’s All Things Considered in 2002, after their initial attempts at collaboration -- brokering a Mideast peace accord and mapping the human genome -- proved unsuccessful.

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Federal funding is gone.

Congress has eliminated all funding for public media.

That means $2.1 million per year that Connecticut Public relied on to deliver you news, information, and entertainment programs you enjoyed is gone.

The future of public media is in your hands.

All donations are appreciated, but we ask in this moment you consider starting a monthly gift as a Sustainer to help replace what’s been lost.

Donate